I Said Yes! My Marriage Proposal...

Please Note: For my past followers & hopeful new followers who have known me as Chloe Moon, a name I've always loved...my real name is Melanie. =) 

For those of you who are curious...This was the blogpost from my previous blog about the day Craig and I became a couple:

Melanie's Randomness - Craig and I became a couple - 2010

More to follow tomorrow...

Love always, 

Chloe Moon (aka Melanie) 

Monday Check-In! Being Kind to Yourself...A Diet Post

Just me this morning! 

So yesterday I weighed myself and was still not seeing crazy jaw dropping numbers and I let out a frustrated sigh. Craig heard my outburst and entered the kitchen where I have my scale. He gave me his usual your crazy look because I was standing there in only a tank top & underwear with my pajama pants on the floor yelling at the scale.  "Chloe? Uhh...Are you okay?" He cautiously muttered. He then glanced down at the scale and mouthed the "Oh" he knew I didn't need to hear. He quietly left the kitchen to give me a my moment. 

A few minutes later I put my pants back on and emerged from our tiny kitchen. I didn't expect Craig to be sitting on the couch staring at me with his lips pursed together. I said, "What?" to him and I didn't expect his answer at all.

He said...

"Chloe, I want you to not weigh yourself until next Monday, uh the 27th,  when your next blog post is up. It's not fair to you to keep weighing yourself everyday because your not going to see any results that way. Besides babe, you've only been at the gym a week. You need to give your body time to adjust and react. Please don't step on that scale and trust me you'll see a difference in 2 weeks time. Oh and even if the scale isn't showing it, I can totally tell a difference in you already."

Sometimes I really love this man of mine. His encouraging rant was just what I wanted to hear! I know it's bad to weigh yourself everyday but it is a bad habit of mine that I promise to break this week. No stepping on that scale at all. This week I'm going to be kind to myself and be proud of my last week's accomplishments. =)

A picture of part of the circuits at my circuit training class I almost walked out of on Friday.

Like I said yesterday I am proud of myself for sticking to it with the circuit class but damn it was difficult! I'm proud that I went to Power/Strength Yoga twice also last week. I didn't realize how involved Yoga can be. I think movies and TV Shows just usually show someone wrapped up like a pretzel and say yeah that's yoga but it's a whole body experience that I hate to say it I think I'm a lil less stressed after those two classes!  My fitness journey isn't just going to be just yoga classes but I'm finding it very good to take a hard class then a yoga class to stretch out the muscles! 

Eating wasn't as successful as my exercise efforts. However I am striving for 3 meals a day at least with tons of water. Eating well is something I will definitely be striving for a better attitude on this week! Less carbs later in the day is going to be a big goal for me!

My favorite new 3pm snack - Dannon Light & Fit Yogurt w/ Frozen berries & Frozen Strawberries

Cheers to another week of Exercise & Eating Right!
Who's with me! =)

Stolen Moments Sunday...

Alexander Mcqueen  - Savage Beauty, Voss Collection

"There is blood beneath every layer of skin." - Mcqueen

There are two words ringing through my head to describe this weekend...

PROUD & HAPPY! =)

I'll explain...

~ I was proud of myself for not leaving a circuit training class at my new gym that to be honest I was not in shape enough to do. I should have left when I realized what type of "circuit" class it was...let's just say trampolines, bouncy balls you balance on & me don't mesh well at this point in my fitness journey. But the instructor realized I was in over my head & each exercise circuit she came over to me and gave me a modification to fit my pace. It was a small victory that I held through the hour! ~

My painting w/ acrylics inspired by Alexander Mcqueen's dress above

~ I am proud of myself for being able to paint this lil picture up here. I can't remember the last time I painted or was able to find the perfect inspiration. My friend that I've reconnected with in the past few weeks invited me over to paint and at first I thought it was going to be silly but it wasn't. It made me happy. I can't wait to get a lil frame for my picture! ~

~ Craig and I went to one of my friend's going away party and he dropped the "F" bomb that had my ears buzzing. I was behind him & he was meeting someone new and he said, "There is a brunette around here wearing a red shirt with a bow on it. She's soon to be my fiancee." I said "What?" out loud and he was like "What?" and pretended he didn't say it but he knew I was behind him. These hints are making me happy. Ever so happy. ~

~Also at this going-away party, I saw the cutest gift ever! My friend is going to work in Israel for 6 months so her best friend wrote her a card for almost every event that is going to happen in the next 6 months. A card for when it's raining, when it's valentine's day, when it's her birthday (all the party-goers signed this one), when it's a bad day, and then a couple other scenarios. My friend cried of happiness! It was such a thoughtful gift! ~

~I was proud of my self on Sunday morning that I got up and went to a yoga class. It wasn't hot yoga just normal yoga and wow it was intense! I had no idea it worked you so hard! =) ~

~Craig, me & his mom went out to Ruth Chris for dinner for Craig's upcoming birthday. I was happy to hear about Craig as a little kid. I've learned so much about this man in the past 3 and a half years and I love learning more. They also talked about his father, whom unfortunately I will never get to meet because he passed away a few years before I met Craig. I love that I have been able to paint of picture of the man. ~ 

Here's hoping this week isn't too bad. 

*Crossing my fingers*

What were your Weekend Stolen Moments?

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*I love red and black dresses*

Living Together: 1 Electric Guitar, 3 Bass Guitars, & 1 Acoustic Guitar Later...

Craig's old band (Craig is 2nd to the right with the orange bass guitar next to the drummer)

Photo taken by me

Almost 4 years ago when I met Craig he was learning to play the guitar. I knew he could play the bass too.  In all this time, I never would have imagined he'd be rocking out in a Brooklyn, NYC venue up on a stage in front of the blaring lights! It's been a wild ride and several new instruments later the band up on stage is breaking up...and I'm at a loss for words.

In the past 3 and a half years Craig has been in 3 bands all of which has fallen apart for various reasons.   It seems when it all becomes real people bail and it honestly sucks. Craig and I didn't live together when the first 2 bands were going on and I didn't see how much went into being a band or how much Craig has giving up. This past year living together I've seen the practicing, the tired nights coming home after a 11am show in Manhattan or Brooklyn, the let down when someone decides to leave the band due to artistic differences, and the insecurity this process can bring to someone. It's fucking hard. 

But when one band closes another band door opens. Craig is already in a new band and I'm sitting here hoping he's honest with this band. Truly honest about everything...giving up finishing school for now(I'm furious about that lil fact I discovered)...being too tired for a date night here & there...giving up summer vacation in case he's going to tour with the band...pretty much giving up parts of his life before the band. The band knows he has an 8-5 job and they know about me, so I just hope they give him a life too outside of the band. 

I'm trying to be super supportive of his journey and I understand it's hard because this band is new and he wants to make a committed first impression. I'm just hoping it doesn't draw us apart. Craig needs to realize he can have both - His life before and during the band in harmony together and it's something I don't think he has mastered yet. I really hope he can see it and make it happen. It wasn't always the easiest for him to have both in the last band in the past few months. I felt like I was there with him, but not really there "With" him. I have told him how I felt even though I'm trying to be supportive. He said he was going to try and separate as well as put the two parts of his life together. It's a process that I know won't come over night, but I'm still going to cross my fingers that it will! =)

I guess this is part of a relationship when people say you are never the same two people as when you first meet...

"I belong with you, you belong with me, you're my sweetheart..."

- Lumineers, "Hey Ho"

Craig's old band (Craig is 2nd to the right with the orange bass guitar next to the drummer)

Photo taken by me

Hump Day Confessions!

"I suppose I should tell you what this bitch is thinking..."

- Hard out here Lilly Allen

So one of the coolest girls that I have the joy of reading her blog and seeing her fitness amazement is Kat from the blog, Vodka & Soda! Today she is hosting Hump Day Confessions and I today I have to join along!  Here it goes! =)

~My new gym that please don't get me wrong is very exciting but I'm also super intimated. It could just be the hours of the day I'm going but everyone that goes there is a supermodel. There is tons of fit/toned/thin women wearing sports bras as their tops and I swear I feel like they'd walk over me if I got in their way. I went to a yoga class and I was the only one that raised their hand as a newbie and the girl next to me did a pose so insanely over-the-top I've only seen it done in porn. She was this close to kicking me accidentally in the face coming out of the pose too. No way am I throwing in the towel here , but I definitely need to kick up my self confidence a couple notches! ~

~Everyday I'm struggling with my job. Anxiety has distorted me so bad that I'm OCD with simple tasks that should take minutes. It took me 4 and a half hours to do a 30 minute project. I went over my work at least 6 times back and forth just to be on the safe side. I need to find a safe breathing point that I can be less stressed. ~

~Craig the other day told me that he is giving me an early Valentine's Day gift next Friday. I wonder if it's a ring. He told me over the summer that if he doesn't propose to me at some point in 2014 I'm allowed to give him an ultimatum or leave him. I love him with all my heart and would never think of breaking up with him because he didn't propose to me. But now I'm wondering about every big event, every date night, every lingering kiss, or late night cuddle. Will it be then? Will it be now? When? I wish he hadn't said what he said in the summer ~

~I still have my Christmas tree up in my tiny apartment. For some reason I just don't want to put Christmas away this year. ~

~My cat, Angel, has discovered that we have a leaky faucet in the bathroom. It's hilarious because now her head is always wet. I just hope she isn't drinking from the toilet. I tried one of those deodorizing pods and it stained the water reserve part of the toilet so my water is ALWAYS BLUE! It's like a freaking airplane in here!~

~I recently realized I have a dream to open up a cafe, specially designed to have amazing pastries, a book club corner, a bridal/baby shower room, and there will be a board game at every table with old 50's juke boxes on the tabletops. At night, the cafe will transform to a bar with a late night coffee/cupcake menu and every Thursday will showcase a local band. I want this dream more than anything. Also to be a published writer. That would be wonderful too.

~I compare myself to others way too much. ~

Well there's some Hump Day confessions! Off to dishes! =)

(Side Note: Not really, I just thought this was funny. I was happy to share my confessions!)

"Sometimes it's hard to find the words to say 

I'll go ahead and say them anyway...

It's hard, it's hard, it's hard out here for a bitch" 

- "Hard Out Here" - Lilly Allen

(One more confession - This Lilly Allen song is like my new favorite song!)

Monday Diet/Weight Loss Check-In - A Started New Beginning...

My yummy salad for lunch today - Apples, cucumbers, baby corn, carrots, olives, radishes, baby spinach, mushrooms! Yum Yum! 

Starting Weight: 1/6/14 - 191 lbs

Todays Weight: 1/13/14 - 189.2 lbs

Pounds lost - 1.8 lbs

{See Side Note@Bottom}

Hi Everyone! I was happy to write this post today and seriously I couldn't wait for Monday since Friday afternoon! I've taken my new beginning on a weight loss/health mission and joined a better gym and have taken a real pledge to get this party started. Wow, endorphins make you cheesy. lol. Hmm...now where to begin...

My old gym, Planet Fitness,  one of the aka The Biggest Loser TV Show sponsor gyms, was just not cutting out for me anymore.  I had joined a few years ago & for $10/month how could you resist? In the end of 2013 I just didn't want to go there anymore. They had pizza Mondays, bagel Wednesdays, it was far from my home, and it didn't have any fitness classes. If my favorite show was on, I had to make sure a treadmill or bike was open in front of the hanging TV and sometimes there wasn't one. I don't want to say I didn't have a great experience at Planet Fitness, but I outgrew it I feel. I needed more, much more. 

On my way home from Planet Fitness I always passed what I called the "fancy" gym and sometimes had to sop for gym goers to pass the street in front of my car. This past Friday...I finally entered the "fancy" gym. Out of all the comparable prices for gyms with classes and multiple fitness options this one was surprisingly not as expensive as I thought it would be and I immediately felt overcome by this sensation of "Yes, I need that extra boot in the ass to come here" & "I need to be a part of this place." I signed up immediately and the best part is it is 3 minutes from my house. Yup, 3 minutes. No excuses, no whining, I have no excuse now to not get in shape. Not one. 

My Real treadmill workout summary...1/13/14.

Today I have to thank How I met your mother, 2 Broke Girls, Mike & Molly, & a lil bit of The Hangover 2 for occupying me while I walked 5 miles. I'm not going to lie, my feet fucking hurt (need to get a shoe insert) but I feel damn good and proud of myself! It was my first day back so I took it slow  and didn't go too crazy. I'm not sure what came over me! I just walked & jogged a little bit (emphasis on little bit) and I did it. 

Day #1 -> Go to the Gym/Eat Well -> Complete! 

Now I just have to keep this up! Tomorrow at the new gym there is a hot detox yoga class I'm dying to try and then later in the week I'm going to try a beginner spin class. I feel like such a nerd but I'm really excited for all of this! It's been a long time since I was this excited and motivated so I'm going to run with it and pray I don't lose too much steam! =)

Oh and ladies get a Victoria Secret sports bra. It will change your life. I got an Incredible by Victoria's Secret Sport Bra and I'm kicking myself I didn't buy more than one when they were on sale the weeks of Christmas! 

Side Note: 

I almost didn't want to put how much I weight I lost this week because I knew it wouldn't be much. It was my time of the month last week and I always gain a few pounds of water weight bloat each month. I don't care what the fitness guru's or TV Shows say...some women should not even try to lose weight during their periods because let's face it, your body is going to do whatever the hell it wants for however many days it wants to do it. I can't wait for next week's numbers though!! Those are going to be results, I hope! =) 

How's your diet/health check/weight loss journey coming along?

I'd love to hear! 

We are all in this together! 

{If you comment please come back later, I'm going to try and reply to everyone's comment! I'm going to try and make Monday Check-In interactive hopefully! Much love, Chloe! } 

Stolen Moments Sunday

Her, 2013

This weekend was one of many stolen moments that I will forever hold in my heart. 

~I always wanted to have a boyfriend who would love to go to the movies with me. I met Craig and everything fell right into place for me. We go to the movies, but because he is the most amazing boyfriend I've ever had I get to go to the movies with him and my father. My dad turned 67 this weekend and Craig & me took him to see The Hobbit: Desolation of Smaug and I was so happy to be in that IMAX theater with them. I felt complete. It's a feeling I never thought I would be able to feel. It's wonderful.~ 

~Go see The Hobbit! Trust me, go to the bathroom first, though and don't get a soda at the theater. The movie is LONG! So good though! 

~Sometimes you need to go have lunch with the girls and just gossip, chit chat, and share those stories that keep running through your head. I went out to lunch with two of my friends and I needed it. I needed to vent, needed to know I'm not crazy for feeling a certain way, I needed to laugh, and I needed to know it's okay if this or that happened because it's happened to other girls. ~

~After lunch my friends and I went to see the new movie Her and it's a beautiful lil movie. I don't want to give too much away, the movie trailer does that already, but it's a great date movie and a story that makes you think! Just don't think of Skynet! hehe =) ~

~Today almost everything went wrong, but I didn't let it get to me. My birth control prescription expired even though I have 2 refills left?? (This made no sense to me). My doctor who is in my insurance network sent out my blood work to a lab that was NOT in network so I got one of those, "This is not a bill" where they are disputing $7,500. Yeah...um yeah... But I kept my cool. I'm going to handle it without anxiety and push on. ~

The Hobbit, 2013

I'm going to go watch the end of the Golden Globes! =) 

What were your Stolen Moments this weekend?

Life Lessons: Letting Friends Back into Your Life...

Movie Still, Assbackwards, 2013 

A movie about two best friends on a journey to a beauty pageant reunion.

The day I tossed up my graduation cap at my high school graduation in June 2003 I knew my life would never be the same. Out of all the words of wisdom I was given that day and days going forward about life after high school, one tidbit struck a cord in me and almost 11 years later it is still relevant. 

"You will find out your true friends when study hall is over." 

Oh, how true that lil statement is and will always be. In the test of time, I'm only friends with 2 people I went to high school with & by friends I mean talk to on a monthly basis & meet every once and while for dinner. That number used to be 1 until recently. Somehow in the past year I re-became friends with my old friend Julie who let's just say has burnt a lot of bridges with me and I'm not sure I'm okay with letting her back in my life.

It would take tons of blogposts to explain the past 17 years of my friendship with Julie. I met her my first day of 6th grade in September 1996 at a new school and known her ever since. She is one of the few people that has been there for it all, all my life's ups & downs and let's just say she has chosen to not be the best friend she claimed to be. No one is a perfect friend but some of the things that has happened it's just common sense. I can't tell you how many times she's said to me, "I'm sorry I just didn't think." It's okay when your 15, 19, 22, or even 24, but at some point you have to grow up. 

Movie Still, Assbackwards, 2013 

I wish I could say that Julie has grown up at 28 years old, but I don't know. We met for dinner tonight and it was honestly fun. We reminisced about old times, talked about our families because we both all everyone's dirt, drama, TV Shows, and our futures. It felt good to have someone to talk to who knows me, the real me. But like I said, some of things that have happened between us are very hard to forgive. It's hard to push those grudge feelings aside. I did tonight, but on the car ride home it rushed back. 

I think I'm going to let her reach out to me for the next time we will hang out. If I put the ball in her court, then I'll know if she wants to make a real effort to be my friend again. I think...

Have You Ever had a Friend Come Back into Your Life?

How did it go? Where you able to let bygones be bygones?

Was that old grudge lifted? 

I'd love to hear...

Movie Still, Assbackwards, 2013 

Living Together: A Fight Over Dinner...Part I

Movie still, No Reservations, 2007

"After all this time, I'm still into you..."

- "Still Into You" - Paramore

In less than a month's time, Craig and I have been living together a year. 

*Dramatic Pause*

Honestly, I didn't think we were going to make it living in such a tiny space. We are living in a small studio 1 room condo, with a separate room that is our kitchen, and 3 full to the brim limited space closets. But somehow we have divided up chores, taken the reins on issues, and have found a stable harmony amongst the cramped chaos. There is one area of living together however that is a total mess:

Dinner.

In the beginning I thought I would let Craig make the dinners at his request because he is a very picky eater. I never had lived with a boyfriend before so I just went with it. We are both stubborn only children and at first it was great.  I couponed, got tons of groceries & Craig would make the dinners. Compromise. It was working.

I would make a few dishes now and again, but as the year progressed those came to be few & far between. Too much ordering in, too much of the Craig's tacos, pizza, burgers, & pasta, and pasta-roni has allowed me to gain a considerable amount of weight. I never ate like that when I lived alone. Auto-pilot through the summer and then holiday season, left me not speaking up and just eating whatever Craig made. Dinner was also our time together to unwind and share stories about our day. I cherished that time and didn't really see it as overeating and unhealthy eating. I should have said something a long time ago. I gave WAYY too much control over and it lazily just kept the peace with this issue.

After the revelation that dinner is a BIG issue/obstacle to my diet I suggested certain things. I suggested new foods that I could make that would be healthier choices. Well, Craig doesn't eat peppers, eggplant, zucchini, mushrooms, & is hesitant to try new things because he is afraid of getting sick or hating the consistency of the food. The sick thing got to me because I've never made anything so far that has made him sick. He explained that it boils down to opening up the door to new things and that's difficult for him. In acknowledgement of his concerns, the next thing I suggested was eating two different meals. He can eat whatever the hell he wanted, while I'd make a separate dinner to help get myself back on track. *Insert Fight*.  Smashburger is no longer a safe word in our house. Let's just say eating separately did not go over well, especially when that burger place is brought up.

Movie still, No Reservations, 2007

After many discussions, fights, and a little bit of quinoa throwing...there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Next week is my cooking week. I will cook some new dishes & sides along with some favorites of ours, but making lighter choices and healthier ones at best. My goal is to make as many new little things, sort of like a testing menu in case Craig hates this or that. Craig promised me he will be open to trying new things. I am holding him to that promise. I might get that promise in a writing to be sure...

I'm nervous, excited, and hesitant for this next dinner step. It's not that I'm a bad cook, but there is a lot of pressure. I can do this and move forward with this dinner rut that is a problem  4-5 nights a week. Now I'm on a search for recipes...tons of recipes...in case this idea works out for the good! 

So I have to ask...

What's your favorite dinner dish to cook? 

I'd love some ideas to help me out!

I will definitely keep you all posted...This dinner battle is far far from over...

Stay Tuned for Part II!

Movie still, No Reservations, 2007

Chicken Soup for The Soul: Mini Goals

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"If it makes you happy, it can't be that bad..."

- "If it makes you happy" Sheryl Crow

Does anyone remember those chicken soup books that were supposed to make you lighten your soul? I was cleaning my closet for a Verizon installation and found two of them. Out of all the hoopla over them about 10 years ago, I don't think I ever read them in their entirety. But! They've inspired me, along with the blogging world, to find things that make me happy in my everyday life. There are so many things that make me truly happy and smile & with this polar vortex?!? I could really use some chicken soup to warm up my lil soul!

~My Mini Goals~

~Read more...Oh & not ONLY smutty erotic novels too. Maybe some classics! But I have to first read Doctor Sleep, by Stephen King. I'm number 27 on the Library waiting list!! ~

~Write love notes. I know I can leave a lil thing on Craig's facebook wall, but it's not the same. I miss those lil notes of  years ago of "Do you like me? Circle yes or no?" or the notes "You look pretty today." I don't think I've ever gotten a love letter/note. Maybe the days I get Craig's lunch together, by my choice, if we have leftovers from the previous night's dinner I'll stick a lil love note in there. Perhaps he'll send one back...hehe. =P ~

~Go to the movies. There is something about going to a morning matinee, sneaking in a yummy breakfast in my big purse and sitting back to relax & enjoy. My great grandmother Lena used to go to the movies all the time in the 1920's & 1930's...I think I got the movie bug from her!!~

{Source}

~Learn how to play the Ukelele. Yes, the ukelele. For months Craig has dragged me to Guitar center in his buying a new bass guitar process and every time without fail I would go play with the ukeleles. This Christmas, he got me one of my very own!! I have to get an book for beginners but I have to learn. It's such a pretty sound!~

~Drink & try more new teas. I actually love tea. Give me a good chai tea and I'm happy. There is a lil tea cafe in Sleepy Hollow, NY (Yes, it's a real place) by me and every chance I get I stop in for a cup. I have to make it there more often. ~

~Somehow & Someway get a lil flower plant and protect it from cats, weather, and other very likely formidable things to happen.  This one is going to be tricky but I have to try. I love fresh flowers, but this year I'm trying to really save money for life events, so one lil plant would be lovely. ~

~Oh and one more thing...Bake more cupcakes! There is nothing that warms my soul more than people loving my cupcakes. I actually am making some roses for a friend's going away party in 2 weeks and I can't wait! 

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What are your mini goals to warm your soul this year? 

I'd love to hear!