Hump Day Confessions!

"I suppose I should tell you what this bitch is thinking..."

- Hard out here Lilly Allen

So one of the coolest girls that I have the joy of reading her blog and seeing her fitness amazement is Kat from the blog, Vodka & Soda! Today she is hosting Hump Day Confessions and I today I have to join along!  Here it goes! =)

~My new gym that please don't get me wrong is very exciting but I'm also super intimated. It could just be the hours of the day I'm going but everyone that goes there is a supermodel. There is tons of fit/toned/thin women wearing sports bras as their tops and I swear I feel like they'd walk over me if I got in their way. I went to a yoga class and I was the only one that raised their hand as a newbie and the girl next to me did a pose so insanely over-the-top I've only seen it done in porn. She was this close to kicking me accidentally in the face coming out of the pose too. No way am I throwing in the towel here , but I definitely need to kick up my self confidence a couple notches! ~

~Everyday I'm struggling with my job. Anxiety has distorted me so bad that I'm OCD with simple tasks that should take minutes. It took me 4 and a half hours to do a 30 minute project. I went over my work at least 6 times back and forth just to be on the safe side. I need to find a safe breathing point that I can be less stressed. ~

~Craig the other day told me that he is giving me an early Valentine's Day gift next Friday. I wonder if it's a ring. He told me over the summer that if he doesn't propose to me at some point in 2014 I'm allowed to give him an ultimatum or leave him. I love him with all my heart and would never think of breaking up with him because he didn't propose to me. But now I'm wondering about every big event, every date night, every lingering kiss, or late night cuddle. Will it be then? Will it be now? When? I wish he hadn't said what he said in the summer ~

~I still have my Christmas tree up in my tiny apartment. For some reason I just don't want to put Christmas away this year. ~

~My cat, Angel, has discovered that we have a leaky faucet in the bathroom. It's hilarious because now her head is always wet. I just hope she isn't drinking from the toilet. I tried one of those deodorizing pods and it stained the water reserve part of the toilet so my water is ALWAYS BLUE! It's like a freaking airplane in here!~

~I recently realized I have a dream to open up a cafe, specially designed to have amazing pastries, a book club corner, a bridal/baby shower room, and there will be a board game at every table with old 50's juke boxes on the tabletops. At night, the cafe will transform to a bar with a late night coffee/cupcake menu and every Thursday will showcase a local band. I want this dream more than anything. Also to be a published writer. That would be wonderful too.

~I compare myself to others way too much. ~

Well there's some Hump Day confessions! Off to dishes! =)

(Side Note: Not really, I just thought this was funny. I was happy to share my confessions!)

"Sometimes it's hard to find the words to say 

I'll go ahead and say them anyway...

It's hard, it's hard, it's hard out here for a bitch" 

- "Hard Out Here" - Lilly Allen

(One more confession - This Lilly Allen song is like my new favorite song!)