Monday, March 4, 2013

Now She Knows...In The End, There Was Truth...A Relationship Post.

Scott Pilgrim vs The World, 2010

The Boy Next Door...

2008..."You do know Chloe, that Chris only dated you because everyone else was taken. Julia was with Allen, Danielle with Rick, and then there left you. He choose you by default. We all thought you knew..." The first relationship that I could ever call a relationship that was my ushering into basically everything was long past done and in a coffee shop I heard those words as matter a factually as if someone told me they did their nails that morning. I hadn't known this "truth" but it slammed every memory I thought was special enough to still remain friends with that boy next door named Chris. I refuse to be in his presence...he is completely removed from my life. 

The Gray Eyed Spanish Boy (Mentioned here

2008...The instant messages kept coming at weird times all through the night. He would ask me to come down and see him. I thought it was over after he called me the wrong name that steamy night in my car. I knew it was over. The messages and the text messages slowly were waning, but still there. Myspace was still around, and I scanned his pictures for "Emily", the name he called incorrectly called me. It was a friend's girlfriend he said that was in trouble and on his mind blah blah. I scanned every picture...nothing. One day, his profile picture changed. I saw the gray eyed boy who I feel doesn't deserve to be called a man have his arms around a pretty red head. I clicked on the picture and read the caption. My girl, Emily, and me.  There was the "Truth" I needed to move on...

The Mess
2012...It had taken me a while, but I had walked away LONG AGO...A Halloween I've mentioned here years earlier, gave me that feeling it was my time to go. I heard the truth a thousand times but couldn't let the words seep in. Meeting my current boyfriend pushed it all away gracefully, but a party last summer sprung the anger and resentment back. A girl 6 years younger than me, drinking for her first time, caught my arm on the way to the bathroom and told me she knew of my ex and I. She recognized me from the pictures on his Facebook way back when... She confessed that she was apparently another girl my ex was seeing at the same time as me... After everything was said and done with him I found out he had a girlfriend in those last few months in addition to this young girl in front of me that summer day. This girl last summer knew this information too. I said the Truth from my own lips. "Cathleen, we were pennies with that mess of a man. One out of many. The girlfriend was just another penny too. Do you want to go back to being a penny? Being worth one cent to him? Huh?" It was one of the cruelest but truthful things I've ever said to someone, but I needed to say it for my own benefit as well. My answer was no and Cathleen looked up at me and said, no, she didn't want to be a penny either. I hope that was the truth coming from her.

Scott Pilgrim vs The World, 2010

My Best Friend and Her Situation...
My best friend went to the convention that her ex of 2 months would be there too. I wrote about it HERE. I suggested her not go, to just let the relationship end. Well, she saw him... Oddly enough I didn't hear from her not even once during the convention. I really expected to go in there as an emotional bodyguard and just create a buffer or something to help... Not a peep. Finally I called her. 

She had dumped her boyfriend of 6 years because she couldn't support a more than capable man anymore. She grew to hate his laziness, his smoking, his lack of ambition, and his lack of desire to change his spiral of  unproductiveness. Her and I said hello on the phone and I didn't say one more word before she poured out the truth from pretty much her soul. She didn't want to realize that all the words her ex had said in the breakup to her hoping to change her mind were all lies. She didn't want to tell me the truth that she paid for his convention. She didn't want to see the truth that her ex was smoking again and didn't have a job yet. She didn't want to think that things were never going to change for him.

 But she spoke the truth, hoping that the person who is her ex, her ex-friend, does one day straighten himself out. So do I. But she couldn't wait to find out. She also explained she had to go to the convention to see if things had changed. Maybe he could have at least gotten a job...But no. I told her how incredibly sorry I was and I'm so disappointed in my her ex as friend of his too. But this is not my battle. She saw the truth she needed to see and now she feels a weight of guilt she unfortunately has felt for the past 2 months lifted from her...

I'm going to go see her for her 28th birthday in 3 weeks. I think a total girls night out is definitely needed. Hopefully it's a happy time! I hope so! =)

Scott Pilgrim vs The World, 2010


  1. Oh girl , it all was a big mess . I'm glad you did recover and pushed it back .
    Get to the girls night out , everything changes there , have a good time :)
    Noor @ Noor's Place

  2. Ay ay! Have a great girl's night out! So glad to see you stronger and happier!

  3. Sometimes you can't see the truth until you're further away from the situation. It's good you did and your best friend has now as well. Hope you ladies enjoy a fun night out when the time comes.

    Rowena @ rolala loves

  4. Sometimes a girls night is just the ticket. As for the lame-o's in the past, they are what make us appreciate our present and teach us about valuing ourselves. So, while I'd never want to go back, I have no regrets (okay, maybe 1 or 2, lol).

  5. Well, it's good to know at least she's staying strong. A girls night sounds like a must.

  6. It's hard but sometimes we just need to understand that people don't change, she will definitely need a night out.
    Best luck!

  7. Sounds like a girls night out is definitely in order. You and your friend deserve it. :)

  8. You both deserve to have nice men in your lives. Go and have a great girls night out and forget these exes.


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