Movie Still from Take This Waltz, 2011
When Craig and I met, I was 24 years old and he was 28 years old. That's 24 years of quirks and bad habits that have built up for me and 28 years of quirks and bad habits built up for him. To be honest, in the almost 3 years of dating and becoming best friends & of course boyfriend/girlfriend, there is NO WAY they could have all surfaced in the 3-4 nights a week we hung out together before living together. No Way! Some of his quirks I knew about, especially his weirdness about eating chicken, and equally he knew some of mine, like I hate that sound of metal forks or spoons banging on anything ceramic aka a coffee mug, but I think we subconsciously were hiding the really bad quirks we both didn't want to admit we have...
Well, in a studio apartment there can be no hiding anymore.
Well, in a studio apartment there can be no hiding anymore.
Some of my quirks...
- The cat bowls/dishes cannot be washed even if it is licked clean in a sink full of dishes
- I'm always cold
- I mispronounce words frequently or use them incorrectly
- I am a pack rat & will keep even in a napkin if it's pretty
- Every opened bag of chips/bag of salads MUST have a clip...I don't believe in just folding the top over.
- I don't put the cap on the toothpaste.
- I have a tendency to put bowls of little things everywhere.
- I stay in my day clothes until I go bed.
- I have the messiest car EVER.
- Any form of metal banging on ceramic drives me crazy...like banging a spoon on a tea cup.
- I don't roll the toothpaste from the bottom....(Craig added that as he entered the bathroom just now to brush his teeth)
Some of Craig's quirks...
- He has to look at the Expiration date on EVERYTHING! Even if we went to the store a week ago.
- His chicken must be completely de-tendoned & de-fatted or he won't eat it.
- The second he gets in the house, he is changed into sweatpants.
- He uses powder within in the shower, not out of the shower, so the shower drain clogs up.
- He folds over potato chip bags or salad bags and artfully places them in the refrigerator so the folded edge won't spring up.
- Even though he wakes up a 5:45am, somehow he is still out of the bathroom at 7:45am every morning. I don't get it...
- He never puts his glasses away when he puts his contacts in.
- At night, he likes his face cold, but his body warm?!?!
- If I make any form of noise, he asks, "What's the matter?"
Writing out these so-called Quirks has got me thinking that maybe they aren't so much quirks but it's just us really getting to know the real people that we truly are. I'm trying to get Craig to stop putting powder or corn starch on in the shower and I promised to remember to take my long hair out of the drain after I wash it. He promised to put a clip on bags of chips as long as I put a bowl of them somewhere in which he can find them easily. I've taken over the job of putting his eyeglasses away each morning after he goes to work, and he's taken the liberty of tenderly telling me that is not how you say this and that word or phrase. It's a process...
He's a camel who drinks A LOT OF WATER so I make sure there is always bottled water in the house. He bought me a lil insert to put on the toothpaste that rolls it up for me (he got it out the closet just now). I promised not to remove the eggs from the carton and put them in my Anthropologie ceramic egg crate, so he will be able to see the expiration date when the time comes. (I use it for earrings now.) If I make dinner he does the dishes, and vise versa.
It all is working with good days and "Oh, I didn't know you didn't like that?" days. I keep saying I think we've dated long enough that we are able to talk about things that drive us absolutely nuts, but I really think it's true for us. We are not fearing the quarrel about is the sour cream good a day before it's expiration but embracing it...(I think it's still a little nuts but don't tell him =P). Relationships are balances and we are continuing to work on this quirk balance and really get to know each other! But I will say that the quirk he has about cuddling with his cat at night is the cutest thing ever! Don't tell him I wrote that though! =)
How Do You Deal with the Quirks of Your Significant Other?
Or Are They Deal Breakers?
This is probably one of the sweetest post I've read about couples! So real and funny! I had quirks about my husband too (and he me), but I think like you said, you meet in the middle and it's a process of understanding! Now our quirks don't seem like quirks almost to the point where we've forgotten what each other's quirks were! :)
ReplyDeleteSERIOUSLY this storm is driving me nuts - i woke up the last 2 mornings at 5am just to shovel and NO SNOW! - ps we gotta hit up Woodbury together this spring/summer!!!!
ReplyDeletebiggest pet peeve of Joe - he SLEEPS (or "closes his eyes") ALL the time - he can do those 2 min power naps to 3 hour naps - and ALWAYS on the couch - he ALWAYS falls asleep on the couch and doesn't get into bed till 2-3am - which then wakes me up - drives me bananas!
It sounds like you two are doing a GREAT job working with each other's quirks. And really, they don't sound that bad. It could be way worse!!
ReplyDeleteAwesome post! Quirks are what makes us who we are, and as couples, we have to learn to love each other's quirks and turn them into positive things. Not always easy, but I'm sure you're doing a great job! We're trying too! :)
ReplyDeleteaww so great - doesn't everyone have their weird quirks? i change into sweatpants immediately too and tend to leave glasses of half-drank water all over the place. it is a process learning to live with someone, but we have to remember none of us are perfect and we all do our weird things haha.
ReplyDelete-- jackiejade.blogspot.com
Izzy and I had kind of a hard adjustment period. We went from long distance (only seeing each other about once a month), to seeing each other several times a week (when he moved and we were 25 minutes away from each other), to living together. It took getting used to. I lived alone for about a year before Izzy moved in and I got set in my ways VERY fast.
ReplyDeleteCute post! Yup, living together, we have to deal with little quirks that were cute at the beginning, but I now have to remind myself that they are still cute. And we get to create our own quirky things.
ReplyDeleteI lived alone for 3 years before my husband moved in- I thought I would go nuts, but he was the right one, I guess, because I enjoyed it from the start.
BTW, love Take This Waltz. It made my husband really mad and he got up and walked to the bedroom but I stayed in the living room and watched it all. :)
I agree with Charlotte - quirks are who make us who we are. We all have them and the trick is making them work together and making them "fit". Without our quirks we would all be robots :)
ReplyDeleteSounds as if you two are doing a wonderful job of working together my friend, and that's what love it when it's all said and done.
You definitely learn so much more about a person when you live with them. Most of my husband's "quirks" are little things that would never be deal breakers. I've learned to love that part of him, even if it does annoy me sometimes! :)
ReplyDeletexo, Yi-chia
Always Maylee
Funny! My hubs has a lot of the same quirks Craig. Not the chicken thing though. Hadn't heard that one before! ;-)
ReplyDelete-Jamie
ChatterBlossom
I can totally relate to this and I'm still discovering new quirks even after 3 years of marriage :)
ReplyDeleteToo funny.
This is an awesome post , great read .
ReplyDeletexo Meg<3
Meghan Silva's Blog
Love this! It sounds like you and Craig have learned to cohabit quite well together. I think quirks are a big part of everyone's personality and what make each of us unique. Some of my husband's quirks make me crazy but at the same time I think they're the cutest thing cause they're his except well maybe the snoring like a chainsaw one :p
ReplyDeleteRowena @ rolala loves
Those little quirks can be annoying but when you love someone they end up being endearing. John and I have lived together for 5 years - the only thing he does that I cannot stand is smoke. I hate the smell. The worst thing I do is let things for my shop pileup in our bedroom. :)
ReplyDeleteMost of the quirks I've learned about my boyfriend (been dating for a little over 4 years now) are definitely kinda cute, a couple annoying, but none of them deal breakers. We learned how to openly speak to each other but everyday is an adjustment :)
ReplyDeleteI really agree with Wendy. I have been with my husband for six years. We both have quirks, but they have graduated from annoying to endearing. I really didn't have very many things that bothered me about him in the first place, which makes being with him even more fun.
ReplyDelete